Debbie Ferree, CPLC, CPC
Certifications
Certified Professional Life Coach
Certified Partner Coach with APSATS
Certified Peer Facilitator Coach, C-SASI
Member in good standing with ICF
My Story
Adopted, sexually abused, not fitting in, didn't feel accepted or truly loved, were what made up my childhood. While some of those feelings were true and couldn't be changed, some were based on emotion and set me up to be victimized by those who were not well intentioned.
At the age of sixteen, I experienced date rape, which led me down a path of promiscuity. I had lost all sense of self worth and value.
I married at nineteen an abusive alcoholic. Divorced at twenty, I then moved to Florida where I met my now ex husband. He was all the things that seemed to be missing from previous relationships....attentive, caring, giving, sensitive, honest.
Married again at 28, he adopted my son whom I had when I was single, and we had four more children together. Though very busy with raising kids and homeschooling, something was off and I couldn't put my finger on it.
I met the Lord in my early thirties at a legalistic church and believed if I did all the 'right things' that our marriage would work. After at least fifteen years of dedicated prayer, books and studies on marriage, and many marriage conferences, nothing seemed to change.
At a "last ditch effort intensive", I learned of his sex addiction and began the journey of growth and healing.
Experiencing childhood sexual abuse and being a partner, I can empathize with wherever you are in your own journey, from grieving, anger, sadness, feeling crazy, and being angry at God. These are normal emotions for partners.
I would consider it an honor and privilege to walk with you into your healing story.
Common Q & A:
How is Coaching different from Counseling?
As a coach, I will help you stay present as you navigate your healing journey. While past traumas can be addressed, a coach is skilled at helping you stay grounded, focusing on the here and now while moving forward out of stuck places.
Is it wrong for me to want to stay or leave?
No one can decide that except you. I will give you the tools to be able to determine which will be better for you in the short and long term, without judgment.
Am I crazy?
No, you've experience a real trauma by someone you thought was in your corner and wanted what was best for you. At Living in the Light, we will work together as we face the truth of your situation, while helping you to stabilize so that you can make solid choices moving forward.
How long will this take?
That's a great question and one that isn't easily answered. Because every situation and person is unique, it's different for everyone. I can tell you that it's not a "one and done", nor is it a formula to be followed. This journey is as individual as you are and it will take time.
You're divorced. Are you going to encourage me to divorce?
No. I'm a big believer in marriage when a man and woman work together to make their marriage as healthy as possible. Couples should work as a team. Because the dynamics of sex addiction are very different, it is never up to the partner to hold the marriage together.
